How to Resolve Family Conflicts Care, Control and Money: Approaches from Legal, Psychological and Compassionate Perspectives

How to Resolve Family Conflicts Care, Control and Money: Approaches from Legal, Psychological and Compassionate Perspectives

Dec 8, 2020 | aging, aging in place, cost of aging, cost of long term care, financial advisors, handling money for aging parents, long term care, retirement, retirement planning

Few things are more stressful than family disagreements, especially related to helping an aging family member. You’re invited to a VIP Virtual Event: How to Resolve Family Conflicts, Care, Control and Money Approaches from Legal, Psychological and Compassionate Perspectives  

Wednesday, December 9 I 4:00 – 5:00 pm Pacific Standard Time  

Featuring special guest speakers Carolyn L. Rosenblatt, RN, Attorney and Dr. Mikol Davis, Psychologist of AgingParents.com

RSVP david@eleganceatnovato.com (Link will be provided with RSVP)

The first 20 attendees to RSVP will receive “The Family Guide to Aging Parents: Answers to Your Legal, Financial and Healthcare Questions,” The Family Guide to Aging Parents Book by Carolyn L. Rosenblatt.

Five Very Personal Questions Older Advisors Need To Ask Themselves

Five Very Personal Questions Older Advisors Need To Ask Themselves

Feb 5, 2020 | business transitions, financial advisors, financial judgement, handling money for seniors, investor, legacy planning, retirement, retirement planning, senior investor, seniors finances, wealth transfer

Advisors talk to clients all the time about the big topic of retirement. The industry inundates the media with advertising among competitors about who can do retirement planning best. You help clients plan for how to reach their goals. You do your research and calculations. You offer sage advice after years of experience. And then there’s your OWN plan: when is it time to schedule your own exit from the burdens of your work?

We often hear “age is only a number” or “age is just a state of mind”. That’s not really true. Age is a process that takes its toll and ignoring it can be costly. We work, we have our self-image of productivity and success. We pass 50, then 60 still going strong. But one day, you forget an important phone number you should know. You quietly ignore it. Until it happens again. You forget names and that’s not really such a big deal, as lots of your age-mate friends laugh about the same thing. But at the back of your mind there is that tiny, creeping doubt: am I starting to “lose it”?? Fear has emerged in the shadows of your consciousness. “How long can I keep going?”

The literature of the financial services industry is replete with advice about advisors’ succession planning. Sounds good, but it never tells you exactly when to move on, to merge your business with one managed by younger folks, or sell the book of business to someone you trust.

Here at AgingInvestor.com, we offer a deep dive into information about aging clients and how to spot signs of trouble. We give you our professional guidance as aging experts on how to understand when your client is demonstrating dangerous signs of diminished capacity. We give you concrete suggestions about what you need to do. We spend a little time on the subject of the impaired advisor too, and how firms can deal with that. But we have not asked you to look within and formulate a plan for your own exit strategy when you, yourself see any warning signs that age is affecting you in your work.

It’s time to do just that. We know that many advisors are still doing fine at 60, 65, 70 and up. However, age statistics don’t lie and loss of sharpness can happen to anyone. Advisors don’t age differently from anyone else in the world. A few firms do have a mandatory retirement age but most don’t. Independent advisors are independent for a good reason. You didn’t want to march to the beat of an institutional drum. That independence has likely led to greater job satisfaction and perhaps even greater financial success. But it leaves you vulnerable when you are on your own, getting on in years and not clear about whether to merge with a firm, sell, or otherwise set a date for realizing your own exit strategy.

Here are five things to ask yourself in considering the question: when is it the right time for me to exit this business?

  1. Am I noticing any changes in my memory such as forgetting appointments or important phone numbers I ought to remember easily?
  2. Am I having any difficulty concentrating on complex financial information that is part of the nuts and bolts of my work?
  3. Has anyone in my life encouraged me to retire, “take it easy” or otherwise modify my work life?
  4. Have I failed to create an exit plan for myself the way I help my clients set their retirement dates?
  5. Am I afraid that if I retire, merge my business or sell my book that I will lose a sense of my own self-worth or identity?

If the answer to the first two questions is “yes”, that’s a signal to attend to rather than ignore. It may be time to quit while you’re ahead. If you have not thought these things through, that’s what needs to happen. As for the last questions, 4 and 5, consider this. Anyone who gives up a long-held identity based on what you do for a living has to face the same challenges. And many people do transition successfully to a different lifestyle, to finding purpose in other pursuits or in removing a major source of stress that can come from your work. The life cycle does not go on forever, despite society’s denial of aging. Kicking the bucket at your desk is not a pretty picture. On the contrary, you can set your glide path out in a graceful way.

The Takeaways:

If you are 65 or above, you really do need an exit strategy. It could take some years to execute it but have a plan. If you do not have one, create one. If you have any small, back-of-your-mind doubt about being as sharp as you once were in a younger day, pay attention to that little doubt. It just might be your internal nudge to make your exit happen. Consider a strategy that allows this at a time when you can make the most of the benefits involved while you’re still at the top of your game. What you have created has value. Take advantage of negotiating with that value at its high point.

Carolyn L Rosenblatt, RN, Attorney, AgingInvestor.com

What Extraordinary Advisors Do For Retiring Clients That Other Advisors Miss

What Extraordinary Advisors Do For Retiring Clients That Other Advisors Miss

Jan 4, 2020 | aging investor, elder investor, elderly, finances for elders, financial advisors, handling money for seniors, investor, retirement, retirement planning, senior investor, seniors finances

Every advisor wants clients to think that he or she is unique, different, better than the competition. Maybe you are. But if your retirement planning with them stops at calculating their planned retirement income and preserving their assets, you’re not extraordinary. It takes more than that to be outstanding.

Standing out among the others means that you are looking at the client’s entire life and relationship to their family members. Acquiring the courage and skill to do that is how you distinguish yourself from the next advisor down the street or anywhere. So how do you do that? Aren’t you just supposed to do a good job managing the money?

Advising about and managing the money is your essential bedrock, and then there is service above and beyond. That’s the unique play, going beyond average. It’s not so hard to do, but it may be outside your usual comfort zone. You assess. You discuss difficult subjects clients may not want to talk about. You take the time. You communicate more often than the next guy or gal. You offer tools. You become a sort of coach, encouraging a retiree or soon-to-be-retired client to do things that will make life easier for everyone around them. Your guidance can help not only your client, but every person whose life is touched by what your client does and fails to do. Most will likely think how wonderfully unusual you are for doing this. The average advisor won’t bother with any of it but not being ordinary, you can shine.

Let’s start with one tool you can use, created at AgingInvestor.com (free download here). In this article, we address the first item on our Ten Step Checklist For Smart Retirees. The first step is:

“Decide whom you want to communicate with about your future. Set a date and sit down together.”

This sounds simple but it’s not. Clients’ families frequently have poor communication about aging, the potential for needing help, and finances. The elders may want secrecy. Everyone may be afraid to talk about end of life. Although wealthier folks usually do better with estate planning than the less wealthy, not everyone takes the time to update their legal documents and your client’s loved ones need to know this. If you, the advisor encourage a family meeting (or friends meeting if there is no family) specifically about basic topics in your client’s future, that can get the ball rolling on communication about other essential matters related to getting older. The communication must address the real risk of becoming impaired with aging. The checklist is a guide for your client, a place to start. If a client does these steps, it will save everyone enormous and avoidable aggravation later.

Our checklist has ten steps in it. We’ll go through all the ten steps and why they are crucial in subsequent posts. Get your copy today and consider having a conversation with every client age 55 and older in your book about the checklist. You hand it out to them and discuss how to use it. You can bring it up at portfolio review, on the client’s birthday or at the time of retirement. If you want to set yourself apart, talking about things besides the client’s income in retirement will indeed set you apart.

By Carolyn Rosenblatt, RN, Attorney, AgingInvestor.com

 

The Big Tabu: Facing the Financial Industry’s Older, Impaired Financial Advisors

The Big Tabu: Facing the Financial Industry’s Older, Impaired Financial Advisors

Nov 13, 2019 | ageist, aging, aging investor, declining health, diminished cognition, elder investor, elderly, finances for elders, financial advisors, financial capacity, financial judgement, handling money for aging parents, handling money for seniors, investor, retirement, senior investor, seniors finances

At its Senior Protection Conference on November 12, 2019, FINRA took a cell phone poll of broker-dealers. They wanted to find out how many were worried about aging registered representatives at their firms.  The result: 65% were worried, according to the report published in Financial Advisor.  Yes, aging B-Ds are a problem.

Here at AgingInvestor.com, we’ve been sounding the alarm about this problem since 2016, when we published our book, Succeed With Senior Clients: A Financial Advisor’s Guide to Best Practices. “The Elephant in the Room” chapter dives into how impairment in advisors affects the industry and how that most definitely will affect their work with clients. A B-D or advisor whose memory and judgment are impaired, even in the early stages, can expose the firm to liability for mistakes these folks make. Cognitive decline should not be taken lightly.

The speakers at the conference offered attendees very little concrete advice on how to address the problem of an impaired advisor. What could one expect of them? They have no training nor skill set in identifying diminished capacity themselves. Without expertise, their discussions lack action plans.

As aging experts ourselves (RN, Elder law attorney and geriatric psychologist) and a resource to the industry, we question the suggestion that one should wait for “performance issues” to surface before any firm does anything about an impaired professional in its midst. If there is a “performance issue” visible to management, it is likely that it existed for some time and harm to clients already could have occurred. The notion is reactive, not proactive. Isn’t that contrary to the essential philosophy of financial planning itself to look ahead, strategize and don’t wait for a crisis??

Waiting for a manager to call a special team assigned to address the problem is not the best approach, as we see it.  For one thing, most firms don’t have a special team that would serve the purpose of knowing what to do with an impaired advisor. Yes, every firm would be well protected if such a team were formed and that is something we always recommend. However, failing to screen advisors with any in-house tools when impairment is suspected is to ignore the lurking possibility of harm to clients.  What do we mean by an in-house tool? Start with a checklist.

On our website is a free downloadable Financial Advisor’s Checklist: 10 Red Flags of Diminished Capacity to help you spot the warning signs in clients. There is no reason any firm could not use relevant parts of the same tool to spot signs of diminished capacity in its own employees. It is not across-the-board applicable to the professional as compared with a client showing red flags but some points do apply to anyone. For example, memory loss, failure to appreciate the consequences of decisions, confusion, loss of ability to process basic concepts are all on the checklist and are universal warning signs.

What Can You Do With An Advisor You Think Is Impaired?

Proactive steps are essential.  Here are our recommendations:

  1. First, record your observations of changes in the advisor’s behavior. For example, forgetting appointments, failure to meet on schedule with clients, seeing too many blank stares in your interactions with him or her, becoming withdrawn from interactions can all be signs of trouble a manager must address. They could be associated with cognitive impairment or with other health conditions. Managers need to ask the advisor about what they and other colleagues see that looks like a possible red flag.
  2. Ask about general health issues, which can directly impact how an advisor does the job of handling clients. Is it nosy? Yes. Is client financial safety at stake if you don’t ask? Yes. Take the risk of opening the conversation. That is smart. Waiting for a disaster is not.
  3. Establish an in-house policy for what should be recorded by colleagues and reported to managers about possible signs of cognitive decline and the direction you want to take after signs are identified. The policy should be in writing and distributed.
  4. Have a plan to closely watch the apparently impaired advisor.

Asking the advisor to work with someone to supervise transactions is one option. Reviewing how the advisor is managing his or her work at short intervals is another option. And with obviously impaired folks who do not themselves recognize their own cognitive changes (not an uncommon thing), have a suspension or graceful exit means to stop the impaired person from putting clients at risk.  This falls under what those conference speakers vaguely referred to as “other arrangements”. Be specific.

This is uncomfortable territory for managers, compliance officers and for colleagues of older advisors in firms. However, the FINRA poll is telling. If this problem were not rising in our midst, 65% of those polled would not be worried. If you are concerned where you work, get your copy of Succeed With Senior Clients: A Financial Advisor’s Guide to Best Practices, now or get a live or online presentation from us at AgingInvestor.com. Don’t put your firm and your clients at unnecessary risk.

By Carolyn Rosenblatt, RN, Elder law attorney, Consultant, AgingInvestor.com

An Important Question For Your Clients Contemplating Retirement

An Important Question For Your Clients Contemplating Retirement

Jun 18, 2019 | aging, aging investor, cost of aging, cost of long term care, declining health, elder investor, elderly, finances for elders, financial advisors, financial judgement, long term care, nursing home, resources for senior, resources for seniors, retirement, retirement planning, senior investor, seniors finances

An Important Question For Your Clients Contemplating Retirement

Longevity is increasing, as millions of Americans are living to 90 years and above, the U.S. Census Bureau reports. Will any of these long-lived folks be the parents of your current clients? Some clients reaching retirement age themselves will be dealing with the challenges of their aging family members, even as they plan their own retirement years.

One critical question perhaps not built into your calculations for retirement income needs should be whether your clients can reasonably expect to have to support their aging parents. As reported by NPR citing the Census Bureau report, nearly 20 percent of 90- to 94-year-olds live in nursing homes. Among those 95-99, about 31 percent are in nursing homes. And in the 100+ population, 38.2 percent live in nursing homes. Who pays for that care?

Most financial advisors have a basic understanding that Medicare benefits are very limited when it comes to nursing home care. Post hospitalization, the maximum benefit is 100 days and most people do not receive even that, due to qualification requirements. For those who have to live in nursing homes long term, rather than for shorter stays involving rehabilitation such as physical therapy, the costs are paid out of pocket. The exception is for the lowest income elders. For them, Medicaid pays the cost of long term nursing home care. For everyone else, a long stay in a nursing home can wipe out an older person’s assets. The financial burden then falls on family who may have the means to prevent the impoverishment of their loved one.

Some adult children will not allow Mom or Dad to live in a nursing home long term. Maybe it was a promise they made to the aging parent. Essentially, it is no one’s first choice of where to go when care is needed. If a family has some assets but does not want to wipe out their own retirement income by paying for nursing home care or even full-time home care, the most cost effective solution is to take in the aging parent.

There is a cost involved in this choice as well, and it extends to many factors beyond money. Every family relationship in the household is impacted. Some adult children are not patient, not willing and not good at caring for an impaired aging parent in declining health. For others it is seen as an honor and a final chance to give back to the parent in gratitude for what the parent did for them over a long lifetime. Individuals vary in their perspectives, ability and willingness to take in an aging loved one.

Some families take in an aging parent and pay for part-time help, providing a significant part of the caregiving themselves. Others pay for assisted living for an aging parent, but that is not suitable for those who need care around the clock. Others allow a parent to spend down their assets until they can qualify for state paid nursing home care. The parent is then placed there somewhat as a last resort.

No matter what choice a client will make about an aging parent, it is important that the financial professional in their lives helps them see the big picture and plan according to anticipated needs for both the client and the elders for whom they feel responsible.

The Takeaways

  1. Longevity is creating an issue for families who are facing years of decline in aging parents who may not have the means to pay for care on their own.
  2. Responsible financial advisors must raise the question with every retiring client: is there someone in your life that you will likely have to support financially during your retirement?
  3. Advisors and families alike must consider and plan for how any essential financial support should be handled by adult children of aging parents. Take in the parent? Supplement the parent’s income by paying for home care or assisted living?
  4. When the means are not available to offer financial support, and the physical needs for care are extensive, it sometimes becomes necessary to allow the aging parent to become impoverished and to qualify for Medicaid. Medicaid does pay for long term nursing home care.
  5. For those with sufficient investment income expected, financial support for aging parents can be part of an overall retirement planning strategy. It is up to the financial professional to help with this process.

 

Carolyn L. Rosenblatt, RN, Attorney, AgingInvestor.com ©AgingInvestor.com™

 If you the financial professional need a clear explanation of the actual costs of long term care, whether at home, in adult day centers, assisted living or skilled nursing, get the facts so you can plan with clients. It’s all laid out for you in Hidden Truths About Retirement & Long Term Care, available now. Click here to get your print, digital, or audio copy.

About Carolyn Rosenblatt and Dr. Mikol Davis

Carolyn Rosenblatt and Dr. Mikol Davis are co-authors of The Family Guide to Aging Parents (www.agingparents.com) and Succeed With Senior Clients: A Financial Advisors Guide To Best Practices. Rosenblatt, a registered nurse and elder law attorney, has more than 45 years combined experience in her professions. She has been quoted in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Money magazine and many other publications. Davis, a clinical psychologist and gerontologist, has more than 44 years experience as a mental health provider. In addition to serving his patients, Davis creates online courses and products to assist professionals and the public with understanding aging issues. Rosenblatt and Davis have been married for 34 years.